Kaal rattire

“Maa, bhNo diye diyechhe. taRataRi choloooooo.”

Maa ar ami douRochchhi. bhiR bNachiye, eNkebNeke. amar mukh theke anorgol “excuse me, sorry sorry” chhitke berochchhe. je jaygata diye chhutchhi seta anekta plane-e othhar jonyo je asthayii suRongota pata thake tar moto. dhalu, laal ronger carpet moRa. khanikta giye dekhi ek mohila suRonger moddhyei table chair pete bose ticket bikri korchhen. 4 taka kore dujoner bhaRa 8 taka. maayer bag-e taRataRa 10 takar note. bhodromohila kichhutei 2 taka pherot debenna. mukh dekhei bojha jachhhe onar kachhe achhe, kintu deben na. jehetu daayta amader, tai moja dekhben. bhagyis amar kachhe chhilo. ekta 5 takar note ar tinte 1 takar coin mohilar mukher opor pray chhNuRe diye ami maayer haat dhore taan marlam. chhut chhut chhut. totokkhoNe amader charpasher lokjon-o douRote shuru korechhe. ato loker paayer chape suRongota dulchhe bipojjonok bhabe. praNpoNe douRe giye ami daan paa rakha matro gogonbhedii hahakarer moto ekta bhNo diye chheRe dilo jahajta.

Biraaaaaat jahaj. sada laal dorakata. bhiishoN ujjwol ar baajkhNai dekhte. suRonger mukh theke aalga hoye jete shuru korechhe already. nicher kromosho chowRa howa phNakta diye ghono niil jol dekha jachchhe. ami bNa paata tule ene steady hoye dNaRiye maake taan mere tule nilam. bNacha gechhe, babbah.

Jahajer bhetorta abikol Staten Island ferry-r bhetortar moto. saari saari komla ronger bosar seat. beshi bhiR nei. keu keu seat-e bosechhe, beshirbhag-i edikodik hNetechole beRachchhe. anek khali seat. amra janalar pashe duto seat dekhe aaram kore boslam. ektu duure thonthon awaj shune dekhi ekta jhalmuRiwala byasto haate muRi banachchhe. ami mukhta jothasombhob koruN kore maayer dike takate maa gombhiir golay bollen, “dekho abar er kachhe khuchro achhe kina.” ami haat neRe muRiwalatar drishti aakorshoN korlam. angul diye V kore dekhalam je amader do muRi chahiye. ektu pore ese duto muRir thonga amader haate diye amar haate dhora 10 takata niye bemalum hNata lagalo. ami chNechiye bollam, “seki, 3 taka kore chhilo to!” muRiwalata chole jete jete ghaR na ghuriyei uttor dilo, “5 saal pehle.”  

Jahajta bhoyanok jore chhutchhe. eto boRo jahaj, kintu ki pick up! baapre. ektukhani uNchu hoye janala diye gola baar kore ami jahajer gaa theke chhitke jawa dhobdhobe sada joler phena dekhte laglam. oto nich thekeo joler chhite amar mukhe ese lagchhe. maa pash theke ekbar bollen, “Sona thanda lagbe. soja hoye boso.” ami kaan dilam na. maa-o janen kissu hobe na. kintu tao na bole thakte paren na. adbhut.  

Duure Statue of Liberty-r bodkhot sobuj ronger muurtita dekha jachchhe eibar. ami sobe edik phire maake dekhate jabo, hothat ekta prochondo jhNakuni. maa haater ulbona phele aNtke uthhe amake japte dhorlen. anyanyo jatriirao ghabRe gechhe. duekjon jhNakunir chote matite poRe gechhe, bakira samne je ja peyechhe, seat-er pithh, dorjar haatol, soru rod dhore taal samlechhe konomote.

Sobe dhatostho hoyechhe sobai, amio maayer haat chhaRiye abar ghaaR baar korte jachchhi janala diye, tokkhuni arekta dhakka. sommilito ekta aarto chitkar uthhlo amader jahajer bhetor theke. sokoler-i totokkhoNe ektai kotha mone poRechhe. ebochhor-i Titanic-er 100 bochhor na?  kintu ghumonto iceberg? Hudson-e??

Ekebarei na. totokkhoNe amar chokhe poRechhe arekta laal-sada chNucholo mukh, jete tiibro gotite dheye ese pechhon theke dhakka marchhe amader jahajtake. ichchhakrito. amader jahajtao goti baRiyechhe, joler chhitey ami ebar bhijei jachchhi pray, jahajer baki lokerao totokkhoNe anyo jahajtake dekhte peye janalar kachhe bhiR kore ese setake ja-noy-tai bole gaaligalaj korchhe, haater muthii jhNakiye maarer bhongii korchhe, maa amar jama dhore tene tene bolchhen, “SONA BOSO BOLCHHI EKKHUNI” ar ei somosto golmal chhapiye shona jachchhe arekta gola. bodmash jahajtar chhade choRe ekta roga, kalo lok gola phatiye porishkar Banglay chNechachchhe, “Howrah! Howrah! khali gaRi! khali gaRi!”

*****

Ghum bhenge bichhanar opor khanikkhoN thom mere bose thakar por oporer ghotonata dhiire dhiire porishkar mone poRlo. aro anekkichhu chhilo swopnotay, aneke chhilen. jemon Debashree Roy. kintu kothay chhilen ki korchhilen, sesob thik thik mone korte na paray sheshporjonto tNake baad dewai sabyosto korlam. kajei baRaini ektuo, borong kichhu komiyei likhechhi. On God Father Mother. ebar ball apnader court-e. amar e swopner psychoanalysis  jodi korte paren, ar seta jodi amar monomoto hoy, tahole kono gift voucher nei, tobe bhabikaler kachhe “Sigmund The Second” bole je khyato hoben se protishrutituku achhe. pakka. 

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Punorbar poton

Duur theke laal tuktuke Samsonite goRate goRate aschhe dekhamatro ami chhota shuru korlam. puro chhota noy. Half chhota half hNata. pash ar pechhon pherar majhamajhi angle-e shoriirtake set kore. mathar bhetor jhot kore hiseb kore nilam thik kotota gotibege chhutle laal suitcase ar ami ek-i muhuurte ek-i bindute somapotito hobo. akashe othha ball catch dhorbar jonyo cricketer-ra jemon chhoten anekta sei kayday.

Hisebta tukhoR hoyechhilo. nijer mukhei bolchhi. Suitcase-er haatol ar amar haat pray chhNoy chhNoy, emon somoy somosto hiseb taalgol pakiye dilo.....ke abar, sorbotro je gol pakay, amar academic career-er aasha je eka haate kuchikuchi kore phelechhe, amar sei chirokaler Shani, omitted variable. ekta cholonto trolley-r chhodmobesh dhore pechhon theke ese soja goRalite thokkor.

Poromuhuurtei ami jiibone prothombar chakkhush korlam airport-er ceiling dekhte kemon hoy. Glass half-full walara nirghat matha neRe bolte shuru korechhen, “dekhechho, bhaloi holo. emni to ar ghaaR tule dekhte na? koto koshto kore engineer-ra baniyechhen, koto science, koto projukti, koto porishrom. anichchhete holeo sesob admire korar sujog je pele, ei ba kojon paay bolo?”

Kintu amar glass-e jehetu sorboda tolani, tai ami esob kichhui dekhlam na. borong komorer byatha agrajhyo kore chNechiye uthhlam, “MY BAG! MY BAG! OMG! MY BAG!”

Dushkritii Trolley-ta thelchhilen ekjon thakuma. dekhlei bojha jay taRahuRo korar karoN ghoteni jiibone tNar anekdin. dhiiresusthe egiye ese amake pray ekhaatei tule phele tini koRa golay bollen, “Its gonna come back. You know that, right?”

I know. kintu uni jeta janenna seta hochchhe conveyor belt theke bag tolata amar kachhe ekta diirgho, ati diirgho soforer shesh checkpost. M.G.Road-e jhaRa 2 ghonta jam-e dNaRiye thakar por khNa-khNa Howrah bridge. saap-ludo board-e 98 nombor ghor. ruddhoshwas detective boiyer shesher 10ta pata. puro 113 minute bose thakar por abosheshe “Hathat Niirar Jonyo”-r shesh drishye pNouchhono.

(113 minute-er tothyotar jonyo wiki-r sahajyo nite holo bole ami lojjito ebong abak. karoN ota hesekhele amar jiiboner most smoroNiiyo 113 minute. apnara jNara jNara dekhenni cinemata, potropathh dekhe phelun. noile ki haraben nijeo janben na.)   

Konomote bag-ta haatate parlei byas. “Chhuti! Chhuti!” bolte bolte Hallar bhalo-rajar moto naagrachoti haate goliye chhutte beriye poRa jabe. abar ko’diner jonyo seatbelt, security check (bisheshoto random security check, jekhane line-suddhu loker chokhe samne amakei tule niye giye sara gaa thabRe thabRe dekhar byapar thake), gomRamukho airhostess, naak daka sohojatriir kobol theke mukti!

Airhostess-der byapartao sondehojonok. onader ki special training thake nervousness shNuke dhore phelar? noile amar pasher loktar sathe dibbi hese hese kotha bollen, ar ami jei angul uNchiye class-e didimonir anumoti niye baire jawar moto mukh kore ek glass jol chailam, tokkhuni haasitasi ube giye mukh pathorer moto shokto? uni ki ter peyechhilen je jol chaibar aage ami kromagoto mone mone jop korchhilam, “he bhogoban jeno na boke jeno na boke jeno na boke....” Prophecy-r moto tension-o je self fulfilling hoy ke janto.

Jai hok, je kotha hochchhilo. Conveyor belt theke suitcase uddhar. je kota bishoye amar soubhagyer dour ekhono abyahoto, kukurer kamoR na khawa ar haaRgoR na bhanga chhaRa, seta hochchhe aeroplane-e luggage na harano. derite esechhe, talabhanga abosthay esechhe, ekbar to kara jeno suitcase khule bhetor theke ekjoRa notun juto-o gaap kore niyechhilo, kintu ta sotweo suitcase amar protyekbar ese hajir hoyechhe. sobar bag chole esechhe, airport phNaka hoye gechhe, ami diirghoshwas phele airlines-er office khNujbo bole rowna dichchhi, tokkhuni jhiri jhiri ghomtar phNak diye godailoshkori chale mukh bar korechhe se. amar luggage.

Jani apnara aneke already hingsey laal niil sobuj hochchhen, kintu bishwas korun ete amar kono haat nei. raag jodi kortei hoy, amar kopaler opor korun. sotyi bolte ki, ami nijei kori. Sudiptar bandhu Arijit ekbar suitcase haranor por British Airways-er naakkaan mule $3500 aaday korechhilo. seta shune amio roj raate shute jawar aage prarthona kortam, “thakur amaro suitcase hariye dao pleeeeease.” sheshe moriya hoye Christmas-er chhutite sobai mile Raili di’r baRi jawar somoy Philly airport-e neme, jeno monei nei emon bhab kore gotgotiye beriye jachhi, emon somoy Banti pechhon theke hNekedeke bollo, “seki! Suitcase-ta nebena naki! achchha bhulo to!!”

Ki bollam ektu age? kopaler naam Gopal .

Tarpor anekdin periye gechhe. ami buRo hoye gechhi. 5 hajar dollar dileo suitcase haranor moto romhorshok adventure-e namar murod ar nei amar. tar theke bhaloy bhaloy ghorer suitcase ghore phiruk. ami take unpack kore tar bhetor theke amar bishwosto Pepto Bismol-er golapi shishi sojotne baar kore amar bedside table-er opor sajiye rakhi. ar jiibone kichhu chaina.

Eto kotha thakumake bujhiye bolar somoy chhilona amar bujhtei parchhen, karoN laal Samsonite totokkhoNe paak kheye abar jhirijhiri ghomtar pechhoner andhokar guhar uddyshye rowna diyechhe. ami konomote kNadher bag ar choshma samle uthhe, thakumake thank you-tank you bole sedike chhut lagalam.

Ebarer calculation-tao jothariiti nirbhul chhilo. adrishyo howar thik aager muhuurte ami hNyachka mere laal suitcase belt theke namiye anlam. namate giye kNadhe ektu byatha pelam bote, kintu bedside table-e swomohimay biraj kora Pepto Bismol-er shishitar dike takiye se byatha anayase sojhyo kore nichchhi.

Saapholyer secret

Ajker Abantorer anupreroNa Rahul Dravid.

Bhul bhabchhen, ami Rahul Dravid-er fan noi, chhilam-o na konodin. tini jokhon Bharater hoye prothom mathhe naamchhilen bat haate, alpo jogging korte korte pitch-er dike egochchhilen, helmet-er phNak diye ghaR ghuriye mepe nichchhilen juddhokkhetre shotrupokkher abosthan, je juddhokkhetre porer 16 bochhor tNake tNike thakte hobe, tokhon amar sodyo sweet sixteen. Hormone tunge. tobu tokhono ami amar koyekjon classmate-er moto khoborer kagoj, magazine, potrika theke Rahuler chhobi kete kete ghormoy sNatini. sNete dewaler cholta tule diye babar kaanmola khaini.  kanmola kheye “amake tumi chhaRa keu bojhe na” bole se chhobi buke chepe ashtoprohor fNyachfNyach-o korini. bishesh kore ei chhobita. 

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Naaah. Not my type. amar borabor bhalo chheleder bhalolage. anekta eirokom.

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Kingba etao cholte pare.

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Serechhe, buRo boyose ki notun kore fan-roge dhorlo naki? chhobi tanganor dhum dekhe nijer-i kemon kemon sondeho hochchhe. eibela prosongo palte phela jak maane maane. bhaloy bhaloy.

Asole ajker bishoyta thik Rahul Dravid non. tNar abosorgrohoN-o noy. emonki tNar mapa, nirlipto, ‘feelings’-biborjito athocho souhardyopuurNo bidaykaliin boktritao noy. tNake borNona korte giye beshirbhag blog, khoborer kagoj, aro nananrokom protibedon ityadite je shobdota byabohar kora hochchhe barongbar, sei shobdota niye aj ami uttejito.  

Self effacing.

Aro beshi uttejito karoN shobdota emon kore byabohar kora hochche, jeno seta khub ekta bhalo kichhu. Self effacement jeno ekta mostoboRo guNer byapar. choritre ota thakte hoy. noile loke kharap bole.

Ki bhayanok chokranto bhabun dekhi! notun projonmoke bhul pothe chalito korar ki nyakkarjonok procheshta!

Online abhidhane dekhlam lekha achhe self-effacement maane hochchhe, the act or fact of keeping oneself in the background, as in humility. arthat kina soja Banglay amra jake binoy boli. bidyar sathe jeta aapse ase. ba aasto ekkale.

Sob-i bujhlam, kintu eta bhulle cholbe na je ekhon jug bodlechhe. binoy, bhodrota, soujonyo esob pragoitihasik hoye gechhe bohudin. ogulo dhuye ajkal ar keu jol khay na. sotyi kotha, khele choleo na. eta aggression-er jug. ar attitude-er. “Stay hungry” ejuger slogan. lokkhyer pothe je badhai asuk na keno take taan mere upRe phela ekaler broto. sobaike thhele samne aaste hobe. nijer kotha nije jorgolay sposhto bhashay “communicate” korte hobe. chNihi golay biRbiRole cholbe na. Attitude chai, attitude. 


Sobtheke boRo kotha nijeke jodi nijei bhalo na boli, anyo keu bolbe keno? ami jodi na bishwas kori ami sokoler sera, anye korbe keno? baba maa-i jodi nijer chhelemeyeke "bhiishooooN smart ar intelligent" na bolen tobe ki paRapoRshite bolbe? swamii stree-i jodi eke oporke "best" ar "kindest" ar "most sensitive person alive" khetab na den, tobe ki ajana achena loke debe? tader ki kheye deye ar kaaj nei?

Sesob mathay rekhei dhundhumar ekta self appraisal likhechhilam. likhetikhe nijei mohito hoye gechhilam. ghuriyephiriye dekhchhilam baarbaar. kirokom buddhi khatiye ekkhan kaajke shotokhan kore likhechhi! kirokmo kaayda kore ekta idea-r mathay ek ekrokom porchula poriye nobo nobo ruupe take bajare chaliyechhi! nijer naamer pashe hard-working, productive, efficient, useful, ityadi bachhabachha bisheshoN sajiyechhi dhore dhore! emon sajiyechhi je nijer chokhei dhNadha lege jachchhe. 

Eta ami? eto kaaj korechhi ami ek bochhore!

Appraisal-ta send kore dibbi furfure mejaje bose bose paa dolachchilam, aapel khachchilam, emon somoy ei 'self effacing'-er mugur mathay ese poRlo. hothat dekhi sobai sur bodle gaite legechhe, "dekhechho, ekei bole bhodrolok. chup kore nijer mone nijer kaaj kore gechhen. Networking-er bodole nijer kkhomota ar protibhar jore saapholyer shiirshe uthhechhen."

Mukher bodole bat chaliyei sob ninduker bolti bandh korechhen. 

Hothat dekhchhi sobar mone poRechhe je khide, loRai, chNachachhola, killer instinct-- egulo bhalo kotha hote pare, kintu dignity, nirolos porishrom, pholer aasha na rekhe kormo kore jawa, sohokormiider proti somman prodorshon--- esob-o phelna noy. borong jeno arektu beshi bhalo.

Nijei nijer dhak petanor moddhye ekta kirokom boka boka byapar achhe na? akashe chNad uthle to sobai dekhbei. na dekhe ki thaka jay? thekechhe keu kokhono?

Bujhun kando. esob amar appraisal-ta joma dewar aage mone chhilona karo? joghonyo. 

Kintu ami bhulchhi na. ami jani eta kkhoNiker hujug. sref arekta hype. Rahul Dravid-er abosorer khoborta headline theke sore gelei sobai abar bemalum bhule mere debe je self effacing howar sathe successful howar kono bibad nei. abar attitude ar aggression swomohimay aabirbhuuto hobe. abar holla kore nijer dhak nijei petate lege jabe sobai. 

Atoeb appraisal niye ar afshosh korchhi na. phataphati likhechhi ami. In fact self appraisal lekha niye apnader karo tips lagle amar kachhe cheye dekhte paren. e byapare amar theke bhalo lok ar paben na. Guarantee.

Ar bolben na

Ki hoyechhilo janen? jante chan? shunun tobe.

Office theke phire dom na phele jama chheRe, mukh dhuye, haatghoRitake shap-shapanto kore chhNuRe phele, basically jesob kaaj kore jiibone keu konodin-o boRolok hoyni, hobeo na, segulo sere abosheshe sei atikangkhito muhuurte pNouchholam…....mukhomukhi ami ar laptop.

Niil ronger taantaan thanda bichhanatar opor ga dhele diye sobe otake buker opor tene niyechhi, khelachchhole angul chaliye sposhto kore tulchhi or keyboard-er khNajbhNaj, se chhNoyay 4 bochhorer purono chena shoriirta kromosho uttopto hoye uthchhe, sei taap amar golapi raatposhak, chamRa, mangso, haaR bhed kore chariye jachchhe rokter bhetor, shiray shiray, amar ni:shwas ghono hoye aschhe, or jantrik fan ghorghoriye ghurte shuru korechhe, haalka ekta gonganir moto shobdo, sobe command dite jabo, EN…..emon somoy hothat sob ghutghute andhokar.

Gongani tongani theme giye chaddik bhuter baRir moto ni:stobdho.

Romance-er ghor kete dhatostho hotei amar lege gelo koyek second. tarpor laaf diye uthhe eta tene, ota thele, seta gNuje todonte lagte holo. sheshmesh dishi poddhotite baar koyek choR-thappoR mereo jokhon mritodeher moto thanda, shokto, chokh ulte poRe thaka laptop-ta theke ektu saRa baar korte parlam na, tokhon bujhlam bhoganti achhe kopale.

Bhalorokom.

Gota 12 phone korlam ediksedik. lokkhokoti * ar # ar 9 ar 1 periye, asonkhyo John ar Jennifer-ke (ami amar ekmaser maine baji rakhte raji achhi oder asol naam Javed noyto Jahnavi) ekshobar ek-i nalish kore kore mukhe rokto tule, abosheshe ami mene nilam je kaal diner aalo photar aage kichhu kora jabena.

Haater opor haat rekhe thNuto Jagannath hoye bose thaka chhaRa. bose bose shuNyo dewaler dike cheye alarm clock-er tick tick shobdo shona chhaRa.

Maa ar Banti ar aro jader jader parlam phone kore du:songbadta dilam. bollam ei 12 ghontar moddhye jodi karo kichhu proyojon-toyojon poRe, emergency-tency, bola to jay na, tahole jeno amake phone-ei contact kore, ami online thakte parbona.

Banti doraj golay santwona dilo, “are chap niyo na Kuntaladi, kar-i ba eto proyojon poRbe tomay? Just chill.”

Hojom korlam chupchap. ar ki, kaday poRechhi, ekhon byanger (ba Bantir, oi eki holo) lathio khete hobe mukh buje. Abantor-er jonyo khetekhute ekta Holi post likhechhilam, seta poRa theke apnarao bonchito holen. tobe mone kore save kore rekhechhi bhagyis, porer bochhor chaliye dewa jabe.

****

Shunechhi shoker saat-ta stor thake. ek ekta stor beye naamte naamte jotokkhoN na shok saat nombor store giye pNouchhochchhe, totokkhoN asol du:khota sompuurNo hridoyongom hoyna. shoker ei jatrata ek ekjoner manusher ek ek rokom hoy. keu haase, keu nesha kore, keu nanarokom paglamo kore. shunechhi didima mara jawar por amar maa naki dibbi swabhabik ghurchhilen phirchhilen, ar mone mone bhebe sara hochchhilen, “sobai eto kNadchhe amar ektuo kanna pachchhena keno? tar maane ki ami maake jotheshto bhalobastam na?”  tarpor shraddhoshanti  motsyomukh chukebuke gelo, baRi phNaka hoye gelo, maa abar college jawa shuru korlen. emon somoy ekdin sondhyebela baRi phirchhen, golir mukh theke baRir barandar aalo dekha jachchhe, tokkhuni, thik oi muhuurte maayer shok saat nombor store giye theklo. ar maa baki rastata kono mote chhute ese, didimar khali bichhanar opor achhRe poRe, “o maa go, tumi kothay gele go” bole emon kanna juRlen je chhotomama chhotomasi dujone mile maake thamate giye golodghormo.

Chhotomama ekhono maake mone koran sekotha, “uff Moni, tui ja khel dekhiyechhili sedin. okei bole ostader kanna shesh raate.”

Amaro serokom kichhu hoye thakbe nirghat. chokh ektuo bhijlona, haat ektuo kNaplona, ami laptop-ta guchhiye bag-er bhetor purlam. Plug point theke ke jane kotojug por power cord-ta khule jotno kore pNyachalam. somoy niye. dhiiresusthe. tarpor sob suddhu tule ghorer koNe rekhe ese ghorer majhkhane dNaRiye komore haat diye bichhanatar dike ekbar bhalo kore takiye dekhlam ekbar.

Full size bed eto boRo hoy bujhi?

Tarpor elo ghum. ore baba se ki ghum. kuul chhapano, paaR bhasano, gram gonjo pothghat rail line dobano bonyar joler moto ghum elo amar du’chokhe. ghumote ghumote ek haat kombol theke chhitke beriye gelo, ek paa λ-r moto dumRe mejhe chhNuye phello, balish mathar nich theke beriye ese kopaler opor chepe boslo. sheshmesh pordin bela 11-tar somoy jokhon ghum bhanglo abishkar korlam raate jedike matha diye shuyechhilam, sedike paa, ar paayer dike matha chole esechhe.

Chhotobelay thik jemon hoto protyekdin.

Ki je bhalolaglo ghumiye ki bolbo. apnarao ekdin laptop-ta puropuri shut down kore ghumiye dekhun, (cheating korle hobe na kintu, ekkebare taake tule rakhte hobe) bujhben sotyikarer ghum kake bole.

Tobe sukhe thaka abhyes nei kina, ghum theke uthhei ghaRe kore laptop dokane diye esechhi. achirei se sustho hoye baRi asbe, ar amio abar ghum boli diye raat jege YouTube dekhbo. ar sotyi tor soichhe na.

Pukur naki Pool?

Sedin ekjoner sathe aalap howar por jeina ami bhoaynok smartly koromordoner jonyo haat baRiyechhi, odiker lokta moha aaRombore buker kachhe du’haat joRo kore alpo jhNuke poRe bollo, “n-a-m-a-s-t-e. I am a Yogi. ”

ANya! bole ki?!

Dibbi swabhabik loker motoi saajposhak, sando genji-halfpant, kNadhe Old Navy-r 10 takar jholabag (sedin kinbo kinbo kore haate niyeo rekhe esechhi, bhagyis), chokhe Tin Bhubaner Parer adhyapok Soumitro marka choshma, paaye flipflop hawai choti, Yogi kirokom?

Jana gelo goto ekmaas holo tini Yoga studio-y naam likhiyechhen. soptahe dudin bikelbela yoga pants pore, kNadhe yoga mat ar yoga block jhuliye giye niyomito Warrior pose practice korchhen. 100% upokar pawar jonyo oi dudin emonki vegan diet porjonto khachchhen. Yogi boiki.

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Mante holo, jukti achhe. amar chehara ar gaayer rong dekhe udgriib hoye tini jante chailen amio “yogi” kina, ami taRataRi jibh kete, kaane angul diye, matha naRiye bollam, “chhi chhi, ki je bolen.” peter bhetor aro ekta kotha bhusbhusiye uthhchhilo Thums Up-er sodyokhola botoler moto, setake ati koshte chepe gelam.

Thakuma bolten, duidiner zugi, bhaatere koy porsaad. (zugi shobdotar opor bishesh jhNok diye bolte hobe. 75% tachchhilyo ar 25% bNyaka haasi mix kore.)

Jai hok. jolojyanto ekjon Yogir sathe aalap hoye gelo ei sujoge. baRi phirte phirte sei kothai bhabte bhabte Yogi theke ‘gNeyo jogi’ kothata mathay ese gelo ar mone poRlo, boRomasi ekhono pressure mapate bus stand-er samner bhangachora ghupchi moto dispensary-tay jan. “meso to ghorei achhe, mesoke diye mapao na keno” bolle mukh bhechke bolen, “dhur tor mesor machine-pottor sob kharap hoye gechhe etodine nirghat.”

Amaro sei dosha. goto Shukrabar ami Bantike “shohorer chhele, cycle chalate janis na, sNatar katte janis na, chhya chhya” bole ektu thatta-moshkora korchhilam, hothat dekhi se ekebare phutonto tele bheja begun chhaRar moto chiRbiRiye uthhechhe.

Ajkalkar chhelera ektutei boRo matha gorom kintu.

“Tumi to tomader oi paRagNeye panapukure haat paa chhNuRte. otakeo sNatar bole na.”

Dekhun dekhi. sNatar holo sNatar. se panapukur ba English Channel jai hok na keno. Carl Lewis na hole ki douRote pari bola jabe na? “khawadaway amar kono bachhbichar nei” bolte gele ki Andrew Zimmern hote hobe? Bula Choudhury na hole ki sNatar katte pari dabi kora jabe na?

(By the way, Bula-o amader odikkar meye. Hindmotor. Bantir dike takiye jibhta jotokhani sombhob baar kori ami.)

Sotyi-i ami paRar pukure sNatar shikhechhilam. tobe panapukur noy seta kichhutei. borong alpo ektu baRiye bolte allow korle take anayase ‘kaakchokkhu’ naam dewa jay. se pukurer dhaare sotyi sotyi ekta jhuri namano buRodadu Botgachh chhilo, golper boite jemon thake. haway se gachher chhoto chhoto laalche golgol phol jhore poRto jole. sei jole loke snan korto, kapoR kachto, Municipality-r kol-e jol na ele bason-o majto, Durga thakur bhasan jeten, neRi kukur nordoma ghNata paaye neme jol kheto. ar amar boyos 4 chhNule ekdin sokale baba ghoshoNa korlen, sei pukurei amake sNatar shikhte jete hobe.

“Aaj thekei.”

Kanna peye giyechhilo bishwas korun. jole namar bhoy to chhiloi. kintu koshter anyo ekta guurho karoN chhilo. pray Shanibar bikelei baba amake cycle-e chapiye rail-line-er opaarer boRo park-e niye jeten. sei park-er pashe chhilo mosto dighir moto ekta swimming pool. tate koti koti bachcha sNatar shikhto. Pool-er epare opare Water Polo-r jaal lagano chhilo. shikkharthiider karo mathay laal tupi, karo niil, karo holud. laal tupir dol sobe jole nemechhe, holud tupira tire chhaRa eka ekai bhaste shikhe gechhe, ar niil tupira, jake bole ostad sNataru. tara pool khali hole Water Polo khele.

Amar boRo saadh chhilo orokom laal tupi pore pool-er jole nambo. sNatar class-er jonyo besh notun jama, notun tupi, notun choshma hobe amar. rongchonge cute tire-e matha goliye ami jole bhasbo, TV te jemon dekhay.

Kothay ki. sob swopno taaser ghorer moto bhenge poRlo. baba gamchha kNadhe phele mota golay bollen, “Sona taRataRi cholo, amar office deri koriyo na.”

Pukure pNouchhe amake ekhaate tule jole chhNuRe dilen baba. Just like that. tarpor amlanbodone pechhon phire Kundubabur sathe Potoler agundor ar Bidhansabha nirbanchan niye alochona korte lege gelen. ekmatro sontan bNachlo ki morlo ekbar ghaR ghuriyeo dekhlen na.

Gallon gallon nongra jol gile ami sNatar shikhe gelam, 7 dine. porer soptahe babar cycle-e chepe park-e jete jete dekhi laal tupir dol line diye doRi dhore joler opor paa naRate shikhchhe. aapatoto daan paa. Next week-e bNa paa naRate shikhbe. tarpor daan haat, bNa haat, tarpor matha, t-a-rpor Push-Pull-Recovery, t-a-a-r-p-o-r butterfly , t-a-a-a-r-p-o-r breaststroke, t-a-a-a-a-a--a-a-r-p-o-o-o-o-r backstroke.

Mone poRle ekhono buk chire diirghoshwas beroy amar. amar sombol kulye freestyle, joler opor konomote matha jagiye rekhe hNakpak kore bukbhorti shwas newa ar chhaRa. maane maane praN niye paaRe pNouchhonor tagide haat paa chhNoRa.

“Tobe?” Banti bNyaka haase. “bhora Gangay poRle tomar oi elopathaRi haat paa chhNoRa kono komme lagbe na. or jonyo proper training chai. osob gramyo sNatar janao ja na janao tai. Same thing.”

Ei bole amar thNota mukh ekkebare bhNota kore diye kaar sathe jeno hasihasi mukhe chat korte lege gelo. ami ar ki kori, moner du:khe bose bose amar sei gNeyo pukurer dharer gNeyo Boter kotha bhabte laglam.

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Appraisal

Office jawar jonyo griishmo, borsha, fall ba spring, kono season-i bhalo noy bote, kintu sobtheke kharap ni:sondehe ‘appraisal season’.

Jeta amader office-e cholchhe ekhon.

Bhabben na ami amar appraisal niye chintito. dekhe bojha na geleo, jo hoga dekha jayega, etai amar jiiboner niiti. tachhaRa jai hokna keno baRabaRi kichhu hobena bolei amar bishwas. khub bhalo kaaj korini abar khub kharap-o korini. baarkoyek haatepaye dhore deadline 24 ghonta baRate hoyechhe bote kintu kauke mukher opor “amar dwara hobena nije bujhe nin” bolini. kajei talegole paar peye jabo ebareo.

Majhari howar asubidhe achhe anek, kintu subidhei beshi.

Tobu je amar ajkal office-e jawar kotha mone poRlei mukhta ajante pocha badame kamoR poRar moto hoye jachchhe tar jonyo daayii amar gutikoy sohokormii. apnar office-eo enara achhen nirghat. sob office-ei thake. Office, kachhari, school, college, university sorbotro thake. erai poriikkha hall theke beriye lokjonke dhore dhore proshnopotre tuke ana uttor melate lege jay, poriikkhar aager raattir 10:37-e phone kore akash theke poRe, “ seki Pure Exchange Equilibrium korisni, ota to aschhei”, dinner-er por adday ceiling-er dike dhNoya chheRe udas mukh kore bole, ke highest pabe se to jana kothai, omuk sir-er nariijatir proti pokkhopatitwer kotha ki ar jante baki achhe karo?

Pure Exchange General Equilibrium: ami ekhono bhalo kore bujhini, porikkhar ager raate bojhar cheshta korle poriNoti ki hote pare anuman korte parchhen nischoy

Nije ashtoprohor tension-e theke sei tension loker ghaRe jotrototro chalan korai eder swobhab. suurjo je protyekdin sokalbela puurbodike uthhchhe, setao eder mote kono ekta brihottoro shoRojontrer angsho.

Amar jiibondorshon abar eto jotil noy. keu poriikkhay highest pele, ta se chhele meye goru chhagol jei pak na keno, nirghat beshi poRechhe bolei peyechhe ei juktitai amar mathay ase. temni bhalo kaaj korle appraisal bhalo hobe, maine baRbe, noile baRbena, etai amar soja hiseb.

Je hisebta, amar protibeshii Mr. W’r mote, agagoRai bhul. sholo-aanai phNaki. bishoyta naki motei eto sojasapta noy, er moddhye naki ajosro pNyach, akothyo politics, bistor doladoli, dedar paa-chatachati ar entar lyang-maramari achhe.

Coffee room-e dNaRiye edikodik dekhe gola namiye druto haate chini gulte gulte jokhon tini sei maramarir kotha amake bishode bojhate laglen, ki bolbo, amar ghaRer kachher khuchro chulgulo sob khaRa hoye uthhlo. Director naki meeting-e bolechhen, ebochhor koRa haate appraisal hobe. temon temon hole maine baRar bodole komeo jete pare, ‘let go’ hoye jawao bichitro noy.

Ami konomote dhNok gile gola bhijiye niye bollam, “koi ami to janina esob...” W amar proti probol anukompa hene bollen, seta ki kore hoy tini bujhte parchhen na karoN office suddhu sobbai naki jane.

Tarpor bodhoy amar mukhta dekhe tNar maya holo. Coffee hate niye beronor somoy bondhutwopuurNo chokh motke tini bole gelen, amar chinta korar karoN-i nei. chinta korbe tara jara ghonoghono deadline miss korechhe.

Serechhe.

Coffee mathay uthhlo. ami desk-e phire hiseb korte laglam ebochhore ko’bar amar deadline miss hoyechhe. tarpor mone poRlo gotokal sokalbela director-er sathe corridor-e mukhomukhi hoyechhilo. muhuurtota ami baarbaar mathar moddhye rewind korte thaklam. Director-er body language decode korar cheshta korte laglam praNpoN. “Hi how are you” bolar somoy je phike hasita hesechhilen tini, tar kotota nichhok abhyese, ar kotota “eibar ter pabe bachhadhon”, uddhar korte giye oi choRa AC-te boseo amar kopal gheme uthhlo.

30 minute por ar amar kono sondehoi roilo na je jodi keu “let go” hoy, tobe seta ke.  

E-o chhilo kopale, bhogoban?

Konomote angul steady kore speed dial korlam, opaar theke shok-rog-taap-hora gola bhese elo kaane, “ki hoyechhe Sona??”

Ar bNadh manlo na. hNaumau kore ja bollam ati koshte ta uddhar kore maa haha hese uthhlen. tarpor haasi thamiye bollen, “chakri gele gotmotiye baRi chole asbi. maa meyete chhade madur pete shuye shuye akasher tara gunbo. bNacha jabe.”

Badhyo hoyei amake jhNajhiye uthhe bolte holo je yaarkir somoy noy eta motei. maa jante chailen, kaaje gnanoto phNaki diyechhi kina? ichhe kore? phNaki marbo bolei? Office-e karo sathe paaye paa badhiye jhogRa korechhi kina? Boss-er kachhe mitthye mitthye karo naame lagiyechhi kina? protishodh newar jonyo?

Motei na. kokkhono na.

“Tahole kono chinta nei.” maa abhoy den. baRi giye borong naake besh khanikta sorsher tel dhele ghumonor poramorsho den. sheshe mone koran, “bhalo loker kharap hoyna Sona.”

Ami nishchinto hoi. shoto shoRojontrer theory-r cheye ei pNach shobder bakyota mone rakha eksho guN soja. ta se thik bhul jai hok na keno. sobtheke boRo subidhe hochchhe, kothata jodi mene ni, tahole bhalo appraisal pele bhalo lagbe, kharap pele bujhbo nijer doshe peyechhi. du:kho hobe, tobe anek kom.

Appraisal-ke tai ar dorachchhi na motei. jo hoga dekha jayega. ki bolun?

Stalking

Bangla bhashar doinyo ami apni kromagoto chapa dewar cheshta korle ki hobe, shaak diye ki ar machh dhaka jay? ei jemon stalking-er kothai dhorun. ektao bhodrogochher Bangla protishobdo, amar matha theke antoto, berolona. apnader mathay asle janaben doya kore. anusoroN, anugomon, anu-whatever theke shuru kore bhabte bhabte ami sheshmesh pichhu-kora, pechhu-newa, chhine-jNoker-moto-pechhone-lege-thaka marka chorom anobhijaato, chhaposha shobdobondho porjonto chole gelam, konotai ‘stalking’ bolte amra jeta bujhi seta thik thik bojhalo na. shobdotar moddhye ekta je creepy (abar fail, chho chho Bangla) byapar achhe seta prokash korlo na.

Ulte etobar etorokom kore pichhe, pechhu, pechhon bolte giye eita mone poRe gelo. kore dekhano sombhob noy, lihke bojhanor cheshta korai paglamo. tar theke nijer chokhe nijei dekhe nin.

Sotyikarer jiibone kauke kokhono stalk korechhen apni konodin? ba stalk-ito hoyechhen? ami hoini. howar kothao chhilona, hoi-o-ni, hoi je ni se niye du:kho-o nei. bNacha gechhe.

Gobhiir lojjar sathe swiikar korchhi, ultodikta ami eto jorer sathe bolte parina. ‘Stalker’ bole nijei nijeke dakadaki korte ekhono badho badho thekchhe bote, kintu oi je chhine jNoker moto karo pechhone lege thaka, setar proboNota ektu holeo amar moddhye achhe. ba chhilo ekkale.

Apnara shiure uthhe window bondho kore paattaRi gutonor aagei boli, ghabRaben na. e stalking se stalking noy. konodin karo baRir ultodiker lamppost-er niche tNaabu phelini, majhraattire phone kore ghum bhangiye “hello hello"r uttore bukbhanga diirghoshwas chhaRini, chhNeRa chirkute uRo chithhi porjonto likkhini. In fact jNader pichhu niyechhilam tNara keu janten-i na je ami tNader pichhu niyechhi.

Ekbar shudhu telephone directory khule PashchimBange joto Mukherjee achhe sobar phone nombor tukechhilam bose bose, bishesh ekjon Mukherjee-r phone nombor khNuje baar korar aashay. sobgulo nombore phone kore kore sei bishesh loktir phone nombore uponiito hobo, etai chhilo plan. baba maa telephone office-e chakri korten kina, free calls-er abhab kake bole jantam na. tukte tukte Mookerjee, Mookherjea, Mookherjee, Mukerjee, Mukherjee, Mukerjea, Mukerji, Mukherjea, Mukherji, periye Mukhopadhyay porjonto pNouchhote na pNouchhotei dekhi amar monojog totokkhoNe mukh phiriye Ghosh naame arekjoner dike juljul kore cheye achhe.

Directory-te Ghosh-er sonkhya dekhe nombor tokar strategy banchal korte holo. Ghoshbabu je bus-e chepe college jeten, amio sei bus-e dhore college jawa shuru korlam. tar phole roj class shuru howar 1 ghonta aage theke amake phNaka gallery-te bose Bethune-er eksho bochhorer beshi purono chhader koRikaathh gunte hoto.

Baghe chhNule 18 gha, pulishe chhNule 36, ar Hormone-e chhNule.....

Science ekhon amar moto shokher stalker-der kaaj anek sohoj kore diyechhe. tokatuki, bus dhoradhorir jhamela nei, akkhorik arthei angulihelone apni karo jiiboner sathe chhayar moto sNete thakte paren. Click. byas. jake chan tar naam, thikana, phone nombor, priyo rong, priyo khabar, sobkichhu apnar chokher samne bhese uthhbe.

Tar opor jNake dhawa korchhen tini jodi blogger hon tahole to ar kothai nei. tini nijei nijer somporke ekgada tothyo sokoler chokher samne sajiyeguchhiye diye rekhechhen, jeta denni, seta nijei goyendagiri kore baar korar cheshta korle kotoi ba ar offended hoben? hoben keno adou? Guilt-free Stalking-er sworgorajyo jake bole.

Ami jNake stalk kori, tNar naam Molly Wizenberg. khawadawa niye blog lekhen, kintu se bishoye amar bishesh utsaho nei. jetay achhe seta holo tNar lekhar bhongiite. sundor, jhorjhore, mishuke lekha. mishuke athocho gaaye-poRa noy. birol balance. jani sobai bole shilper sathe shilpiike guliye phela uchit noy, kintu ami oto bachhabachhi parina. Molly-r lekha poRe amar mone hoy manush Molly-keo amar bhalolagbe, seta bhebe amar Molly-r lekha aro bhalo lage.

Ebhabe chakrabriddhi haare bhalolaga krome briddhi pete pete ekhon emon hoyechhe, Molly jai lekhen tai amar bhalolage, ja koren sobetei amar mone hoy aha jodi amio korte partam, Molly-r purono lekha khNuje khNuje ekshobar kore poRi, Abantor-ke sodupodesh di, Molly-didike dekhechho? bhogobanke bolo boRo hoye jeno amio orokom hote pari bhogoban, emonki Molly-r posha kukurkeo amar cute lage.

Amar chhotobelar bondhura, jara kukur pushte shuru korar por theke tader baRi jawa ami bondho korechhi, tader kaane jeno e khobor na jay, kheyal rakhben.