অবান্তর

2011 hajir. kolpobignaner pata theke beriye honhoniye amar apnar rojkar jiiboner ekkebare modhyikhane. Bhuugol khatar opore daandiker koNay, dewale jholano Maa Kalir payer tolay amogh troyiir chhobike ghire, ar office theke pawa notun diary-r rule-tana chokchoke patay. Ekta diary amar gaaner khata hoto, ekta diary baba niten income tax-er hiseb lekhar jonyo, arekta diary maa agochore alada kore rakhten, somoy pele duek chhotro kobita lekhar nibhrito basonay. Baki diary-der prothom patay potropathh ami nijer naam, dhaam, blood group, Biswanath daktarer pharmacy-r phone nombor, amar sobtheke bhalo haater lekhay likhe pheltam. ar udas hoye bhabtam kobe tax consultant-er phone nombor ar insurance policy renewal date lekhar porom gourober sudin asbe. 9 -e aseni bole 90-e asbar somosto rasta jenoteno prokareNo bondho korte hobe, eta ekta kotha holo bolun? Jai hok, brand new bochhorer choukathhe pa rekhe ami konorokom tiktotar kotha tulte chaina. Notun bochhhorer jonyo apni ko...

Dui dol boRomanusher modhhye probhuuto gol bedhechhe. tate bhuru tolar kichhu nei, karoN ekadhik praptoboyosko ekjaygay hoyechhen athocho eke aporke aNchRachchhen, khamchachchhen, bok dekhachchhen na, erokom ajgubi byapar kono deshe kokhono ghotechhe bole shona jayni. Tobe ei golmaltar choritro ektu bhinno. karoN golmaler kendre chhotora. gurutoro proshnota hochchhe, "sotyer khatire jodio subkichhukei borjon kora jay, Santa Clause ke jay ki?" ekdol golar shir pholachchen, "magic chhaRa chhobobelar roilota ki?", arekdol ghNushi pakiye bolchhen, "praN thakte amader bachhake gNajakhuri golper fNade phelte dichchhina." Dekheshune ami hNap chheRe bNachchhi. BNachchhi karoN amar chotobelay Santa Clause o chhilen na, gachher tolay joRo howa upoharer chhotto pahaR o chhilona, tar protyashao na. amar maa babake ruupkotha jiiye rakhar jonyo matha chulkote hoyni, jonmer sathe sathe sotyer songe gNatchhoRa bNedhe dewar taagide jorjorito hochchhen emonta...

School -e phNaka class-e kotha bolar aporadhke pray manush khun korar category te phela hoto keno, seta amar kachhe ekhono sposhto noy. Class-e homrachomra keu na thakle sobtheke niriiho je binodoner byabostha kora sombhob seta holo pasher loker sathe alapcharita. manchhi, ghorsudhhu meye pasher joner sathe fisfisiye kotha bolleo besh bhalorokom shobdobrohmer srishti hote pare, kintu bhabun to, er bodole jodi tara eke oporer dike joler botol chhNuRe ba benchi bajiye timepass korte chaito, tahole ki aro araajokotar srishti hoto na? Bujhtei parchhen jukti joto sohoj, bojha totoi shokto. atoeb diner moddhey 5 baar sodolbole dNaRano, kaan dhore othoba na dhore, (eta jini shasti dichchhen tNar mejajer opor nirbhorshiil) ga sowa hoye giyechhilo. Byaparta jate eddur na goRay sejonyo kichhu byabostha chhilo aboshyo, jemon ‘naam-toka’. jodio tate keu kokhono bhoy peye mukh bondho korechhe bole shunini. borong je becharar opor naam tokar bhar, take ‘protikriyashiil‘, ‘tiktiki’ probhriti...

Somosto Regression model-ei jemon Endogeneity bias thakbei, ar somosto East Bengal supporter-eri jemon Puurbobonge jomidari chhilo ekkale, temon sob addatei kichhu kichhu Ramgorurer chhana thaken. thaktei hobe. Ramdev theke Radia tapes, jekono gola-phatano, table-chapRano, Coke Zero-r glass-oltano bitorker mukhe poReo jNar bastobbuddhi bindumatro tol khayna, "torko kore kissu hobe na jokhon, tokhon khamoka golabyatha kora keno?" somosamoyik Hindi cinemar choRchoRiye uthhte thaka 'hatke' quotient niye sokkole jokhon tumul uttejito, "eibar Bollywood Nolan ke dhore phello bole" aashay jokhon sobai thorohorikompo, tokhon bNyaka hasi hese jini bolben, "jah jah, osob dekha achhe." Notun bochhorer resolution kii thik korle jante chaile jini abicholito konthhe janaben, resolution-er chhelemanushite tNar ruchi nei. Shudhu eta bolei kkhanto hoben na, jukti diye promaN kore deben keno resolution matrer i akalmrityu aboshyombhabii. keno 'rattire...

Probadprotim je konokichur sathe molakat howai soubhagyer byapar. ta se manush, jayga, boipottor, dokanpaat jai hok na keno. nijomukhe bolte hochchhe bole jibh katchhi, kintu e babode amar emnite phutiphata kopalero performance kharap na. puurNimar aaloy Tajmoholer samner benchite bosar jayga pawa theke shuru kore class 4 e Shimla-Kulu-Manali trip e, mathhe shooting-er dol dekhe bus thamiye douRe giye Mukesh Khannar sathe chhobi tule ana porjonto, sob rokom abhignota achhe amar jholay. Mukesh Khanna ke? dekhechhen, ei hochchhe celebrity der niye mushkil. sobbai ekti kore expiry date niye dhoray esechhen. jobe theke Robibaar sokale luchir thala haate TV r samne guchhiye bose pitamoho Bhishma kingba Shaktiman-er adhut liila dekhar jomana gechhe, Mukesh Khannao sobar smriti theke bemalum hawa. amar amon jokher dhon chhobi dekhiye ar kauke impress kora jachchhe na. Keno amar sathei erokom hoy sobsomoy bhogoban? Jakge . nalish kora kebol somoy noshto. apnara Mukesh Khanna ke celeb...

Miss Marple amar role model, Sidhu jyathha amar hero, Morgan Freeman amar poyla nombor chokher sukh, bNeche thakle aj amar prothom premer meghe meghe boyos hoto 2 kuRi 5. kajei bujhtei parchhen, buRo howake ami dorai na. Borong mone praaNe bishwas kori ekta nyuunotomo boyoser choukathh na perole jogoter kono bhalo jiniser i ruup ros gondho sporsho jothartho anubhob kora sombhob noy. promaN? nim begun, niirobota ebong Harry Potter. Nah , apnar bhul bhanganor jonyo amay marjona korben, kintu jekono kaaljoyii srishtir motoi, oi boitao chhotoder jonyo lekha hoyni. Harry Potter to kon chhar moshai, emon ki Pagla Dashu r moto perfect ekta byapar o somoyer sathe sathe aro nikhNut, aro ujjwol hoy. maante na chaile, haater kachhe boita thakle bar kore poRe dekhun arekbar. Abak howa abantor, karoN setai howar kotha chhilo. bishwas hochchhe na? thik achhe ekkhuni ekta thought experiment hoye jak. phele asa jiiboner emon ekta somoy bechhe nin jekhane apni phire jete chan. apni jodi amar...

Ajke Abantor-e Banglar class. GhabRaben na. apnader Notwo-shotwo bodher bichar kora kingba udahoroN sohojoge Kormodharoy o Bohubriihi somaser parthokyo bojhanor konorokom bod uddeshyo nei amar. emonki golper chhutoy Chorjapod ar Sondhyabhashar itihaas fNede bosar o na. Amar asole bola uchit chhilo, ajke Abantor-er bishoy Banglar class-er golpo. prarthonar thik porei je class ta hoto, je subject-er didibhai rai sobsomoy class teacher hoten, ar sobbai ektu bhulo ar anekta maayer moto. anyotha dekhini ektio. Bolai bahulyo tNader class-e bolar moto golpo-o jomto sobtheke beshi. haasir golpo, dukkher golpo, mojar golpo, emonki bhuter golpo o. baire ajhore brishti nemechhe, timtime tubelight er aalo megher chhayar sathe palla diye klanto, tokhon ghor shudddhu meyer soru mota rinrine golay, “aajke poRte ichchhe korche na didibhai” baynar samne haar mene Subrata didibhai agotya,”sedin o chhilo ajker moto ekta brishtir raat...” shuru korechhen, e ghotona bohubaar ghotechhe amar jii...

Ki theke je ki mone poRbe kokhon, se ek rohosyo. Jemon dhorun, kaal saradin dibbi gechhe jemon jawar. sara diner nishkormota sere ghore dhuke, haat theke ghoRi khule rekhe, 1992 saale Kulu theke maayer shokh kore kena kalo ronger rNoya othha chador joRiye Laptop kole kore bosechhi. Futon-er hatole bose dhNoya chhaRchhe ek cup Tata Gold. emon somoy daan haater 5 angule cup joRiye chumuk dite dite bNa haater torjonii diye youtube-er searchbox-e ami ek ek kore n a z r u l g e e t i type korlam. Bishwas korun, amar bindumatro idea nei, keno. Puurbojonmer smriti bole sotyi i kichhu hoy bodhhoy. je jonme keu gaite bolle bindumatro na bhebe “Porodeshii megh jaore phire” gaan dhora jeto. Griishmo Borsha Shiit Bosonto nirbisheshe. Kintu se kobekar kotha ami nijei bhule gechhi. tarpor to kotodin kete gechhe, koto ghater jol, koto shohorer hawa kheye ami jokhon abosheye amar ei second-hand futon-e bose dudondo jirochchhi, totodine Nazrulgeeti kobeeeee out of fashion hoye gechhe....

Sara sokal dhore honye hoye Abantor-er jonyo bishoy khNujchhi. hNya, na khNujleo chole bolei khNujchhi. jegulo na korle chole na, segulo joto para jay thekiye rakhar basonay. Akash patal haatRe aprasongik kono bishoy na peye agotya prasongik bishoyer khNoje berote holo. ami nishchinto chhilam je kichhu na peleo ajke kichhu ekta dibos-tibos hobe nishchoy. manchhi, seta ‘International Day for Biological Diversity’ athoba ‘World Zoonosis Day’ hole amar kichhu korar nei, kintu borat temon bhalo hole ajker dinta ‘Global Handwashing Day’ athoba ‘ International Talk Like A Pirate Day ’ hoteo to pare. tokhon amay paay ke. Bolai bahulyo, borat kokhonoi bhalo hoy na amar. joghonyo. Disgusted hoye baRi gochhate uthhlam. gochhano na bole treasure hunt bolai uchit. protyekbar ei mohot prokolpe agrosor howar 12 minute-er mathay drawer-er koN athoba shelf-er-haat-na-pNouchhono jayga theke emon kichhu chomokprodo jinis beroy, jegulo amar ghor guchhonor sodichchhake sedinkar moto jomer ba...

Anek poriikkha niriikkhar por scientist ra ei siddhante esechhen, je sobai ja bhebechhilo, asole tar 3 guNer o beshi tara achhe akashe. Apni kota bhebechhilen? dekhi to amar andajer sathe mele kina. Mushkil ta hochchhe, bisheshognora mosto mosto Telescope lagiye akasher ekoN okoN theke tara tene baar kore anchhen thik i, kintu amar ghaaR-uNchu-kora- khali-chokher- gunti diye ami to kichhu tofat thahor korte parchhi na. Tara ra tarader jaygatei achhe, ami i tader dike cheye dekhchhina setao hote pare. sotyi kotha bolte ki aj sokale kagoje tara abishkarer khoborta poRe kom se kom 5 bochhor bade ami tara dekhar bishoyta niye toliye bhablam. Tar maane ei noy je ekkale amar o bishoye daruN butpotti chhilo. emon anekke jani (jantam rather) akasher dike takiye jhotpot gota 30 tara chinhito kore phela jNader bNaa haater khel. tara, tarader naam, dhaam, bongshoporichoy, naamkoroNer itihaas maay puraNer golpo. ami khali Dhrubotara jantam, komorbondhonii ar toroyal dekhe Kalpurush ...

Somoyopojogita Shukrobarer addar ekti prodhan boishishtyo. Current affairs chhaRa amra kotha bolina, apraasongik bishoy niye amader no mathabyatha, amader adda sobsomoyei ‘local’ ebong ‘seasonal’. Kajei Thanksgiving er morshume amra je sei niyei aasor jomabo tate ar sondeho ki. Prothom golmalta badhe menu niye. ekdoler mot chhutota jokhon Thanksgiving, tokhon turkey ar pumpkin pie ekebare baad dile bhalo dekhay na, arekdol otoshoto bojhen na, tNader chai dishi mangsher jhol, dhokar dalna ar shesh paate Patel Brothers’-er Kesar pista ice cream. bistor chNechamechir por ekdol bipul vote-e joyjukto hon. protyek bochhor. Ebochhor khawadawa chukle ice cream-er bati haate niye Raili dir living room-e sobai itiuti chhoRiye chhitiye bosar por, kotha uthhlo etodine edeshtar ki ki jinis dibbi ropto hoye gechhe, kise kise ekhono badho badho thheke, ki ki nehat baRabaRi, ki ki hole besh hoto. Ekta bishoye amra sobai ekmot holam je ' nijer Xerox nije korun' , emoto udbhot da...

আমি জানি না কেন ছবি তোলাটাকে এখনও লোকে শিল্প হিসেবে সিরিয়াসলি নেয় না। বলে আরে ধুর, অর্ধেক কেরামতি তো যন্ত্রের। আর বাকি অর্ধেক ফোটোশপ। ক’বছর আগে অ্যামেরিকায় স্কুলের ইয়ারবুকের জন্য তোলা পুঁচকে ছাত্রছাত্রীর ছবি পছন্দমতো অদলবদল কড়া নিয়ে খুব জলঘোলা হয়েছিল। স্কুলের ফোটোগ্রাফারের তোলা ছবি দেখার পর মাবাবারা বায়না করে বলেছিলেন, ইস আমার ছেলে/মেয়েটাকে কী বদখৎ দেখতে লাগছে...প্লিজ ফোটোশপ করে ওর দাঁতের ব্রেসটা হাওয়া করে দিন। কিংবা চুলের ছাঁটটা বদলে ফেলুন। অথবা জন্মদাগটা উড়িয়ে দিন। কোনও কোনও নিন্দুকে বলেছিলেন, এ আবার কী? ভগবান যাকে যেমন দেখতে করে পাঠিয়েছেন সেরকমটা থাকতে বাধা কোথায়? আর তার থেকেও বেশি বিপদের কথা হচ্ছে, ওই কিন্ডারগার্টেন বয়স থেকে যদি নিজের মাবাবা হাতে ধরে শিশুদের ভেতর নিজের চেহারা সম্পর্কে কমপ্লেক্স ঢুকিয়ে দিতে শুরু করেন, তাহলে বাচ্চার ভবিষ্যৎ কোথায় গিয়ে দাঁড়ায় সেটা খেয়াল আছে? যথারীতি তর্কটা শেষপর্যন্ত ঘুরেফিরে ব্যক্তিগত স্বাধীনতার ঝগড়ায় পরিণত হয়েছিল। আমার বাচ্চা আমি ল্যাজে কাটব না মুড়োয় কাটব তাতে আপনার কী? আপনার ইচ্ছে হয় আপনি নিজের বাচ্চাকে কদর্য আর ...

Idea-r abhaab. ghore, baire, office-e, Abantore. agotya Hermione-e magic jholar moto amar shoishober sinduke aro ekbar haat dhokate holo. jodi kichhu beriye ase ei ashay. Shirshendu bolechhen “nachhoR shoishob”, ami boli nachhoR ami. chhotobela chheRe gechhe sei kobe, ami ekhono golper khNoje tar pechhon pechhon chhutchhi. ulto srote. Kheyal kore dekhben, beshirbhag chhotobelakei alada kore chinhito kora jay setate ki ki ‘chhilona’ sei diye. amar maayer chhotobelay TV chhilona, skype chhilona (ota aboshyo amar chhotobelateo chhilona, tao arki), maay class 8-e uthhle sejokakur dewa haatghoRi porjonto chhilona. Aaj theek 50 bochhor pore amar chhotobelatakeo bhikhirir moto mone hobe. sotyi bolte ki ekhoni hoy. smiley-hiin, text message-shuuNyo, McD-biborjito shoishob. bhaba jay! Kintu sesob jokhon mone hobe tokhon mone hobe. ekhono jokhon bohal tobiyote bNecheborte achhi ebong nijer chhotobelata chokh bujlei besh chhobir moto manospote bhese uthhchhe tar mane ekhono tar darid...

Khub guchhono lokeder alada file thake, keu keu file-er bodole ‘Chhaya Stores’-er boRosoRo plastic diyeo kaaj chaliye nen, khub ‘don’t care’ lokeder toshoker tolay jemon temon kore rakhteo dekhechhi. Amar joto joruri kagoj potro sob ekta laal ronger backpack e thake. backpack niye jokhon beRate jai, tokhon ‘Chhaya Stores’ kaaj chaliye dey. toshoker tola amar sahoser nagaler baire. Oi laal ronger backpack ta hariye gele amar nijeke ‘ami’ bole promaN korar kono rasta nei. naam thikana bongshoporichoy shikkhagoto jogyota, emon ki ami je jonmechhi adou, seta promaN korte geleo amake oi bag theke ekta pray swochchho hoye asa holde patar tukro sontorpoNe du angule chimti kete dhore bar kore dekhate hobe. Kothay jeno poRechhilam ghore agun legechhe dekhe loke dikbidikshuuNyo hoye sob phele shudhu ekta jhNata niye chhute beriyechhe. sei theke ami majhemajhei kolpona korar cheshta kori orokom poristhitite ami ki ki niye berobo, ebong protyekbaar nijeke mone korai, ar kichhu newar somo...

Sedin Shukrobaarer adday pray hatahati howar jogaR. tobe ‘hatahati’ shobdota byabohar korechhi shunle amar adday probesh nishiddho hote pare, kajei ektu shudhre nite din. prothom prothom jokhon desher lokeder, bisheshoto Bangalider ‘argumentative’ swobhaber songe amar oto porichoy hoyni tokhon ekghor lok chNechiye motantor prokash korchhe dekhle setake ‘jhogRa’ bole dhore nitam. tar pore janlam ota jhogRar theke dhher uNchudorer jinis, oke bole torko. idaning dekhchhi amar bondhuder, “achchha anek hoyechhe, ebar torko thamiye chicken wings khao, thhanda hoye jachchhe” bolle tNara bhuru kNochkan. karoN onara jeta korchhilen seta motei chhNedo torko noy, otake bole ‘discourse’. Ja bolchhilam, goto Shukrobarer ‘discourse’-er bishoy chhilo ‘private property’. Actually jhogRa, thuRi, discourse ta bedhechhilo private property te bishwas kora na kora niye. kora uchit ki anuchit tai niye. ar ki ki jinis private property bole goNyo hote pare sei niyeo. Talktime ? Cigarette? Boyfriend/gi...

ছোটবেলায় আমাকে এমন অনেক কিছু শেখানো হয়েছিল, যেগুলো আর কোনওদিন কোনও কাজে লাগেনি। আমার বাবামা বা মাস্টারমশাই দিদিমণিরা যে শিক্ষাগুলোকে অপরিহার্য বলে মনে করেছিলেন, সেগুলোকে বাদ দিয়েও জীবন দিব্যি কেটে যাচ্ছে। আবার এমন অনেক শিক্ষা যেগুলোকে আমি তখন নিতান্ত বাহুল্য মনে করেছিলাম, “এসব আমার ছাতার মাথা কোন কম্মে লাগবে” বলে গজগজ করেছিলাম, সেই ট্রেনিংগুলো ছাড়া আমি আজকের আমিকে কল্পনাও করতে পারি না। তার মধ্যে একটা হল টাইপিং। আমার বাবামা কলকাতা শহরের ‘টাইপ স্কুল জেনারেশন’-এর প্রোডাক্ট্‌। টাইপিং আর স্টেনোগ্রাফির জ্ঞান দুজনের সিভি-কেই সেই বাজারে যথেষ্ট এগিয়ে রেখেছিল। কাজেই মাধ্যমিক পরীক্ষা শেষ হওয়ার পর আমার বাবা দাবি করলেন, তিনমাস বাড়িতে স্রেফ বসেবসে সময়নষ্ট না করে আমাকে টাইপিংটা শিখে নিতে হবে। আমি যত বললাম, “বাবা এটা কম্পিউটারের যুগ, আজকাল আর কেউ না দেখে টাইপ করে না” বাবা কিছুতেই শুনলেন না। গ্লোবালাইজেশনের যুগে সারা বিকেল বসে MS Word -এ ‘ The Quick Brown Fox Jumps Over The Lazy Dog ’ টাইপ করতে আমার চোখ ফেটে জল আসত। এখন যখন অনলাইন হওয়া মাত্র চতুর্দিক থেকে বন্ধুর ছেঁকে ধরে,...

Aj theke bochhor tinek aage, thik jokhon halka shiit poRte shuru korechhe, ami ar Sougata da gobhiir raate Washington DC te poth hariye phelechhilam. Tobe sei Shukrobaar bikele Raili dir phone ta asar 10 minute-er modhhye backpack theke boipotro tene bar kore, ekta T shirt gNuje, lift porjonto giye abar douRe ese tala khule ghore dhuke toothbrush ta haate niye chhute beriye, dorm-er niche gombhiir mukhe gaRi niye apekkha kora Sougata dar pashe bose DC r pothe rowna diyechhilam i ba keno, sei golpota actually anek beshi interesting. Kintu ota amar ga- chhNuye-bolchhi- konodin- kauke- bolbo- na category-r golpo. kajei marjona korben. Tar theke borong ei hariye jawar golpota shunun. etao bhalo golpo, promise. shunei dekhun na. GaRite uthhei dekhi ekta notun jontro amar dike bhableshhiin cheye achhe. Sougata da gombhiir golay bollo, “DC bhalo chinina, rattire thikana khNoja tough hote pare. ekkhuni GPS ta kinlam. dekha jak.” Amra jotoi jontrosobhyotar juge baas kori na keno,...

Golper boi poRa, cinema dekha, Abantor-e prolap post kora, er ektao amar asol hobby noy. khali lokke bolar somoy ami oguloke ‘timepass’ hisebe chalai. “mithyuk!” bole gaal paRar aage amake atmopokkho somorthoner sujog din please. “hobby ki?” er uttore, “ghumono” bole dekhechhi, keu i bishwas korte chan na. keu keu abar torko badhan, keno ‘ghumono’ technically hobby hote parena. Hobby matrer i naki ‘productive’ hote hobe. Ghumonoke aboshyo ami konomotei unproductive mone korina, borong amar mote er theke kaajer jinis ar hoyna, kintu tao torko kore khamoka energy khoroch korar chaite, “ja bolechhen moshai” bole ghaR naRa anek bhalo. Jodio sotyi bolte ki ghumono-o amar priyotomo timepass noy. Abosor pele, ebong na peleo, amar favourite binodon hochchhe nijeke niye bhaba. ei saaRe 3 haat aboyob-er bohirongo ebong antorongo niye bhebe bhebe ami raat din mohanonde kabar korte pari. Sedin office theke pherar pothe ter pelam bNeche thakata bhoyanok boring hoye jachche, abilombe...