অবান্তর

Forasi-der sob bhalo. khabar bhalo, fashion bhalo, ghorer pashe saRe 300 bochhorer buRo thutthuRe Chandernagar uponibesh, seo aj etodin badeo dekhte shunte ki bhalo. emonki forasi dim-pauruti porjonto anyodesher dim-paurutir tulonay ekshoguN bhalo khete. Kajei Shukrobar sokale ghum theke uthhe jokhon dekhlam matha tiptip, sara gaa kemon byatha byatha, jol khete giye mone holo golar bhetor keu bujhi shotoshoto maankochur chash kore rekhechhe, tokhon ami bina dwidhay forasi kayday chhuti newai sabyosto korlam. Banglay jake ‘dub mara’ bole. na phone, na email, na kichchhu. sref dub. Ashchorjer kotha ki ar bolbo, monosthir korar adhghontar moddhye mathabyatha udhhao, 45 minute badei emon changa bodh korte laglam, mone holo jeno ekdome 100 khana donboithok dite pari. tarpor ghoRir kNataduto jei emon abosthane pNouchholo jokhon ar chaileo office jawa jabena, tokhon ami douRe giye freezer theke ‘Cookies and Cream’ er koutokhana bar kore ene TV-r samne bose poRlam. Thyanger opor t...

Abantor ar amar torof theke apnader sobar jonyo diipabolir anek shubhechchha roilo. Diipaboli naamta amar khub priyo. ‘Satkahon’ mone achhe? ki sahosii mohila bolun dekhi. Amader baRite ekbar Kalipujo hoyechhilo. mane ekebare pandal bNedhe, kumorpaRa theke promaN-size protima kine ene light jwaliye dhaker badyi bajiye pujo. tobe du:kher bishoy se alo ba bajnar kichhui amar mone nei. karoN amar boyos chhilo tokhon mote 3. ar amader baRite tokhon handycam to duur asto, kono rokom camerar-i balai chhilona. kajei promaN chaile jibh kete maap chaite hobe. Ami aboshyo pore golpo shune shune dhaker awaj, tube light sob-i kolpona kore niyechhi. Pandal kothay hoyechhilo, thakur kondike mukh kore bosano hoyechhilo, amar maa thakuma pisi jethi kirokom notun shaRi pore byasto hoye ghoraghuri korchhilen, baba kaka jethu chhute chhute purutmoshaiyer khNoj nichchhilen, ekshobar bajare jachchilen aschhilen, sob ami chokh na bujei dekhte pai. Nijekeo dekhte pai. pujoy pawa ekkhana frock pore ...

Tokhon chhilo phNaka mathh, ekhon loklokiye uthhechhe flatbaRi. tokhon paRasuddhu loker "jah aabaaar gelo" chNechiye othha loadshedding, ekhon ghore ghore ni:shobdo inverter-er alor abiram supply. tokhon pujor mukhe Debosree Ladies Tailors-er samne lomba line, ekhon Shoppers Stop-er rastay sarabochhor janjot. tokhon sokal 8-ta bajte na bajtei ei ettokhani Amul butter diye bhate-bhat nake mukhe gNuje school-e chhota, ekhon 3 bela plate-bhorti ghaaspata niye bose mindful-eating. tokhon 12 maas juRe moNimuktor moto chhoRano 13ta poth-cheye-thaka parboN. ekhon? khub katchhNat kore gunleo kompokkhe 1300 ta hobe. Aj (ekhon aboshyo gotokal bola uchit) sei baRti 1287 khana parboNer ekkhana hoihoi kore palito hochchhe Paschimbanger ghore ghore. Happy Dhanteras. ajker ei shubho abosore Abantorer sokol pathokpathika-ke janai amar hardik shubhokamona. Dhanteras sombondhe ami prothom jante pari khoborer kagoje. ekta bignapon, seta TV-r naki gaRir naki Hawai chotir naki pressur...

Anek bhebe ami bar korechhi amar asol somosya konta. mane somosya achhe agunti, kintu jodi bola hoy tader moddhye bechhebuchhe bhalodekhe ekta bolte, tahole konta bolbo seita thik korechhi. Nijeke niye bhabte kii bhalolage na? Jai hok, je kotha hochchhilo. amar goRar golod hochchhe ami shoyone-swopone, khete-shute, cholte-phirte bhabi, bhebei jai je aj theke 10 bochhor aage ki hoyechhilo, kotto moja hoyechhilo, aj theke 10 bochor pore ki hobe. kissui je hobe na, bhebebhebe sei somporke kromosho ni:songshoy hoi. Ajker dintar ei muhuurtotar songe amar somporko pray nei bollei chole. Eto bhebe ami bujhe gechhi lekhok howa ejiibone hobena amar. gaaiye? No chance. bhalo Economist? haha. emonki jeta bhishoN sohoje gaaye hawa lagiyei howa jeto, sei ‘badhyo sontan’-o howa hobena amar dwara. Howa jokhon hobena, tokhon bhebe labh nei. thik kina? Kintu kaal majhraate ghum bhenge emon ekta jinis bhebe bar korlam, ba nije nijei beriye poRlo bola uchit, tate amar gota raater moto ghu...

Protyekbar asar age maa jante chan, amar kichhu lagbe-tagbe kina. protyekbar-i ami boli, kichchhu lagbe na. bishesh kore khabardabar anar to kono manei hoyna. ekhane sob pawa jay. Ar sotyi bolte ki, ekta somoyer por tiler naRu khete pachchhina keno sei du:khe buk phateo na. Out of sight, out of mind. Maa “tothastu” bole suitcase bojhai kore narkel ar tiler naRu, Bapi chanachur, badamer tokti niye asen. ar segulo hojom korar jonyo dubotol Sorbiline. Pepto-bismol ke maa praN thakte bhorsa koren na. Raag korbo bhabi. boyos to hoyechhe. ei boyose oto bhari suitcase etoduur tene tene anar kono maane hoy? kintu maa naRur kouto ar hojomer oshudher shishir por suitcase-er tola theke emon koyekta jinis baar kore anen, jate amar raag-taag gole jol hoye jay. Bangla boi. bNadhai-khola, luchibhaja, lokkobar poRe konthostho hoye jawa boi. nachhoRbanda, attention-lobhii. jara school theke phire uniform chhaRar somoytuku porjonto dito na. maa chole jawar por hothat khali hoye jawa ghorer d...

Koyekdin dhore dekhchi pother majhe ek block uposthit hoyechhe. Block bolle block, phNakibaji bolle phNakibaji. idaning sobai khub Steve Jobs-er quotation forward korchhe, tar-i ektate poRlam je uni bole gechhen, hridoy ar intuition-er kotha shune cholte. amar bindumatro clue na thakle ki hobe, e dujon naki already jane ami jiibone thik ki chai. Ami jani shunle fajlamo mone hobe, bishwas korun fajlamo korar kono uddeshyo nei amar, antoto ei muhuurte na. tobu ami prochur matha chulkeo YouTube ar 'Law and Order' chhaRa ar kichhu bhebe pelam na jake amar hridoy chay. sotyi sotyi chay. Ar intuition ki bolchhe? saradin dhore YouTube ar Law and Order dekhle poriNoti ki hote cholechhe? ba ghuriye bolle, ki ki hobar kono chance nei? sesob ami nijer kachhei swiikar korte chaina, apnader kachhe to proshnoi othhena. Tobu amar Jobs-er opor bhorsa achhe. oto boRo gnaniguNi ekta lok, ekebare na jene ki ar bolechhen? kajei ami apatoto amar hridoy ja chay tai korte chollam, block per...

Songiihiin soptahanter bikele ami hoy grocery korte jai, noyto bose bose Law and Order-er lokkhobar dekha episode gulo abar kore dekhi. dutotei cholonsoi timepass hoye jay. tobe kono kono bikele mathay bhut chape. ejabot ki ki hoyni, hochchhena ar hobeo na, segulo notun kore gunte bosar. Sei sob bikele amar songe potheghate dekha hoye gele khobordar jeno “hi- hello” korte asben na. potropathh goli paltaben. Kintu er baireo koyekta bikel ase jokhon mone hoy, “bah ei to dibbi achhi. khachchhi dachchhi ghumochchhi, office jachchi, phNaki marchhi, maine pachchhi, Abantor-e adda dichchhi, abar ki chai?” sesob bikele ami 4-te bajte na bajtei laptop gutiye, mukh dhuye, chul aNchRe, besh koRa ek cup cha ar dukhana Saltine kheye, ‘Wanna be my chamak challo’ gungun korte korte beriye poRi. Mile khanek gelei trail. keu douRoy, keu cycle chalay, keu hasimukhe haat naaRe, keu pattai dey na. ektukhani giye bNapashe ekta mosto mathh poRe. ami hNatar goti samanyo dhile kori. porishromiira Frisb...

Quiz time! GhabRaben na. General Knowledge khub ekta uNchudorer knowledge kina se niye amar songshoy bohudiner, kajei ami tar porikkha nichchhina apnader motei. Tobe jiibonbhor GK-r sadhonay brotii na howar mane ei noy je chokhkaan buje chollam. kothay ki hochchhe kichhui khobor rakhlam na. ke bNachlo, ke morlo, ke ghush khelo, ke khete giye dhora poRa gelo. tahole bNeche thakar ardhek mojai mati. Chokhkaan khule jodi apni chole thaken, achchha aro soja kore dichchhi, chokhkaan khule jodi apni Abantor poRe thaken tahole etodine ki ki nojore poRechhe bolun dekhi? Gutikoyek adhyobosayii bondhu ar tNader nirolos nishthha nishchoy chokhe poRechhe. Ar ei bhodrolokke miss kore gechhen bolle ami bishwas korbo na. Aj Sugatar Happy birthday. arektu holei bhule jachchilam, kaan ghNeshe bNeche gechhi. bhagyis. Sugata, chai apni aro anekdin susthodehe bNachun, likhun , chhobi tulun, amar ‘apni’ bolar chhelemanushike proshroy din, ar majhe majhe somoy kore guchhi...

Office jabo bole ready hochhi, arthat kina ek minute antor ghoRir dike takiye bhabchhi ei ar 5 minute bade uthhlei hobe, tokkhuni screen-er koNe komola ronger aalo jwole uthhe jigges korlo, “INdur kise more?” “INdur?!?! mane rat?!?!” Proshnokorta moha birokto hoye bollen, hNya hNya iNdur mane rat mane chuha. “kise more?” Late hobei jeneo ei abhuutopuurbo kothopothon theke mukh pherano gelona. jante chaitei holo, hothat iNdur-i ba elo kottheke, ar take maramarir proshnoi ba uthhchhe keno. shunlam kichhudin aage jokhon rannaghore dhuke alo jwalatei mone holo fridge-er pechhone suRut kore ekta badami ronger kii jeno adrishyo hoye gelo, tokhoni sondeho hoyechhilo. tarpor kaal majhrate jokhon roommate rannaghore dhuke, “ei to tuk kore fridge khule ice cream ta niyei chole jabo, khamoka abar alo jwalanor khatuni keno” bhebe andhokare norom norom romosh jyanto kiser opor paa diye chNechiye gota Brooklyn mathay tullo, tokhon ar iNdurer abirbhab niye kono sondehoi roilo na. Ahare....

Gotokalker post-ta likhte likhtei ar lekhar poreo anekkkhoN dhore sondeho hochhilo, thik ei bishoyta niye age ekta post likhechhi na? eki ghotona, eki bhashay borNona korlam na ei kodin agei? Type kora shesh hole, jotokkhoN dhoirjo thaklo totokkhoN Abantor-er purono post-er bandil khNujlam. tarpor “dhuttor” bole ‘publish’-e click kore dilam. Bujhun abostha. Abantorer jhuRite aro ekta post jomlo ar amar atmobishwasta aro ko’dhap neme jekhane giye theklo, sekhan theke take tule ante gele khali haate kulobe na, jhul-jhaRu gochher kichhu ekta lagbe. Chup kore bose thakle to cholbena, kichhu ekta to korte hobe, ei bhebe hrito atmobishwas punoruddhare berolam. edike khNuji odike khNuji, office-e khNuji, baRite khNuji, haate mathhe busstop-e grocery-te take gorukhNoja khNujlam. pelam na. Abosheshe khNojakhNujite istofa diye baRi phire internet khule khate eliye poRa gelo. atmobishwas na thakleo cholbe, kintu net connection na thakle sref mara jabo. Tokkhuni, poroshpathor. dek...

অন্যদিন হলে শেষমুহূর্তে সামলে নিয়ে ‘পৃষ্ঠপোষক’ বলতাম, কিন্তু বাইরে সন্ধ্যের হাওয়ায় সবে শীতের কামড় লেগেছে, ভেতরে টিমটিমে হলদে আলোর নিচে সপ্তাহের মত কাজ শেষ করে গা এলিয়ে বসেছি সবাই, আঙুলে প্যাঁচানো জিভপোড়ানো চায়ের মাগের হ্যান্ডেল। এমন সময় অত মেপেজুপে, পা টিপেটিপে বাঁচতে ইচ্ছে করে বলুন? যা হয় হবে বলে সমস্ত সতর্কতা হাওয়ায় ভাসিয়ে দিয়ে বললাম, -আমাদের অমুকবাবু টপ্পা গানের মস্ত বড় কনোশিওর ছিলেন। বলেই বুঝেছিলাম কী ভুল করেছি। কিন্তু হাতের তীর আর মুখের কথা। বেরিয়ে গেছে কি আর রক্ষে নেই। বেহালার বান্টি ল্যাপটপ স্ক্রিন থেকে চোখ না সরিয়েই রিষড়ার রেডনেককে শুধরে দিল, -কন-ই-সুর কুন্তলাদি। কন-ই-সুর। আমি তক্ষুনি “একদমে কনইসুর বানান বলত দেখি” বলে ওর থোঁতা মুখ ভোঁতা করে দিলাম বটে, কিন্তু সন্ধ্যের মৌতাতটা একেবারে মাটি হয়ে গেল। কন-ই-সুর, শেডিউল, এগুলো বান্টির প্রিয় ইংরিজি শব্দ । ও চায় আমরা সর্বক্ষণ এই শব্দগুলো ব্যভার করে কথাবার্তা বলি, যাতে ও প্রত্যেকবার ঝাঁপিয়ে পড়ে আমাদের উচ্চারণ ঠিক করে দিতে পারে। আমি বুঝি না। হয় এই সাহেবকে টুকবি, না হয় ওই সাহেবকে। শেডি-উল না স...

Sedin baRite phone kore dekhi baba ekebare rege agun tele begun. Raag byaparta amader baRite kichhu durlobh noy, bishesh kore seta jodi babar hoy. kintu se raag dhuumketur moto ase, ulkar moto dop kore jwole nibhe jay. sediner raagtar dekhlam jaat alada. raag na bole take chiRbiRani bolai uchit. jerokom hole ghorer moddhye honhoniye edik theke odik hNatahNati korte hoy ar mone hoye fridge khule ja khabar achhe sob kheye pheli. Byaparta ki jigges kortei holo. ja shunlam seta apnader bolchhi. Baki sob mofoswoli Bangali paRar moto amader paRar basindaderao sarabochhor songskritichorchar adhel sujog pan. goromer chhutite rriturongo, pujor chhutite bijaya sammilanii, shiiter chhutite barshik kriiRa protijogita, ‘Ra-Su-N’ jayanti, ‘Sara Bangla bose aNko’. Baba etodin utsahobhore sesobe angshogrohoN korten. mane jegulote babar pokkhe kora sombhob. chhotobelay keu to tNake tante tante gaan nach aNkar school-e niye jayni, ta sotweo baba cheshtar truti rakhten na. natok hole chho...

Apnader sobaike bijayar anek priiti, shubhechha, bhalobasa, kolakuli. Virtual, bolai bahulyo. samne thakle asol kolakuli kora jeto. chhotobela thekei oi byapartar opor amar lobh. amake khali nichu hoye bishwosuddhu loker paa chhNute hoto. ki je boring bhuktobhogiira janen. proNam korte korte ami aneksomoy mukh tule dekhtam-o na paa joRata kaar. odike baba kaka jethhura ki sundor khanduyek proNam serei eke oporer kNadhe kNadhe thokathuki korten. tokhoni jantam amar sathe keu konodin kolakuli korbe na. emonki boRo holeo na. Ke bole lingobhittik boishomyo nei? Shudhu kolakuli keno, samne thakle apnader ami guRer naRu khawatam, chinir rose dobano goja, kalojire chhitono nimki ar pNathar mangser jhaljhal ghugni-o bad ditam na. Kintu se jokhon hochhena tokhon apnara je jar baRite bose maggi ar shesh paate Coke Zero diye dinner sarun. khidetake thikmoto chagiye tulbar kayda jodi jana thake, dekhben maggi ar mangser ghugni pray ekirokom khete. Bhabchhen yaarki marchhi? porrikkha ko...

Ajkalkar chhelepuleder dekhle amar je ga-jwala kore, emni emni na. ei jemon Bantir kothai dhorun. roj school theke phire emon mukhchokh korbe jeno mara jete or ar beshi deri nei. sedin koto kore iniyebiniye bollam, “chol baba, golituku periye, rastata topke, goRer mathher size-er parking lot-khana hnete giye, eibela pujor bajarta kore ani.” tate chhNoRa ki bole janen? Bole, “ore baba oto hnatle amar hnatu khule haate chole asbe. tomar pujor jama, tumi kenoge jao.” Bujhun. tui hotobhaga buke-peshi-mukhe-haasi togboge noujowan, 25 periye 26-e paa diyechhis ki disni, tui hNatbi na to ke hNatbe? Eder boyose amra pesticide-e chobano toritorkari sokal-bikel kheye hojom kortam, gym-fym er dhar dhartam na, tobu dorkar poRle shohorer ardhek hNetei mere dite partam. Amar jiiboner ek smoroNiiyo hontoner golpo shonabo apnader ajke. je somoyer kotha bolchhi tokhon amar boyos Bantir cheyeo anek kom, mathar edhare odhare sadar chhitematro lageni, galer ekhane okhane ekta duto broNo bhul ...

Shubho mohashoshthii. ajker plan ki apnader? paRar thakurtake ekbar pennam thuke asben shudhu, naki dupurbela phNakay phNakay baRir buRobuRider Bagbajarer thakurta dekhiye anben? Eksomoy amar bhoyanok raag hoto jodi keu pujo to “mote 4 din” bole chalate chaito. 4 din kiirokom? shoshthii kii baner jole bhese esechhe? Shoshthii amar pujor dwitiiyo priyotomo din. shoshthiir sokal, Shukkurbarer sondhye, Giant Wheel-er prothom paak, goyenda golper prothom porichchhed, sober moddhyei sei byaparta achhe. moja shuru hoye gechhe, ebong seta aro aneeeeeeeeeekkhoN thakbe, se ashwas-o achhe. Saptamii perolei to shesh. Shoshthhir sokaler nipat nitol bhalolagar moddhye ekmatro bighno chhilen amar thakuma. onar mathay ke jeno kobe dhukiyechhilo, shoshthir din mamabaRir dewa notun jama porle aayu baRe. Apnara bolben, to? ete bighner ki achhe? porlei to hoy. buRomanusher ichchhe. aha-re. Ami bolbo, bistor bighno achhe, karoN mamabaRir jamagulo sadharoNoto bhoyanok bhalo dekhte ar jho...